I'm tired.

Of people using me. I am constantly trying to be there. I am constantly pouring out and loving and caring. And it’s constantly disregarded. I really don’t have time for it.

Well then.

See what happened was. Last night I came home from school and was kinda stressing since I had a major exam paper. You’d think that since I got it over with I’d be all happy go lucky and like calm. However, this was not the case. I was freaking out more than I was before I did the exam. So, I came home and one of my best friends, Sam called me. He came by to see if I was okay and stayed for maybe like half an hour. We just kinda talked…well he talked to my dad. About frickin guns. While I spastically cleaned the living room and kitchen. Sam actually helped me clean the living room.haha Then I wanted ice cream. So I ate my moms ice cream in the freezer and I put in the movie Armageddon and Sam left. After the movie was over I decided I’d go to bed, mind you it was about one am? So I went to my room but I wasn’t even tired. I turned off the lights and guess what happened?The same thing that ALWAYSSS happens to me when I wanna sleep but can’t. ha Jesus was like, get up. I was like “are you serious right now?” So I knew better than to fight him on this. Got up, blasted me some beautiful Jesus Culture, grabbed my bible, my journal, and shut up and listened. The Lord was really just revealing stufff to me. Things in me I didn’t even think about. It was quite lovely.ha So to sum it all up that’s what happened:)
I’m now in a good mood. Today’s a good day. I’m excited <3

Lord, I am yours.

"For he guards the course of the just and protects the way of his faithful ones."
-Proverbs 2:8

Holy holy is the Lord Almighty!
I am yours! I shout it from the rooftops! I am yours! The Everlasting God! The one, the son. The everlasting God. I shout out from the rooftops, I proclaim, I am yours.

Lord I give you my heart. I place all of my life in your hands.
My future
My friends
My school
My heart
My pride
My happiness
My love
My life
My past
My fear
My family
Church
My desires
My voice
Everything it is all yours.

Lord it is all yours. I am nothing without you! I need you. I am nothing. I love you. You truly are the lover of my soul. You have plans to prosper me. You love me, unconditionally. You give me everything. I am eternally thankful. I need you. God take away everything that is holding me back in any way. I give it all to you! Let your heart, your desires, let it all become mine.
I give you my heart, my body, my soul. I open up and surrender all to you.
Without you, I am purely nothing at all. Nothing else matters. All else fades away. Lord be the one who remains!

"The Lord your God is with you, he is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you, he will quiet you with h is love, he will rejoice over you with singing."
-Zephaniah 3:17

Lead me. Show me where you want me to go. Take me. Guide, direct me where you need me.

Beautiful

"I want to be beautiful.
And make you stand in awe
Look inside my heart
And be amazed
I want to hear you say
Who I am is quite enough
I just want to be worthy of love
And beautiful"

-Bethany Dillion

You are not the first to go through the things you are going through. To face what you are facing. The Lord has written in his word his heart, and his words for you. He is there for you. He knows your heart, He is here to comfort you. You are his beloved and he is yours.

You go through what you do for his Kingdom, to be there for his children.
Mark 14:38, Matthew 22:37, Luke 8:50