That wonderful, beautiful moment.

I live this life the best that I can. Dead to myself. Why? Because I am alive to Christ.
My life is a mess of amazing adventure, & I highly enjoy it. I'm incredibly thankful. I adore my life, I'm so grateful, because my Papa God is so faithful, through it all, in every part of my life.
There aren't enough words in all the human languages to describe.
What blows my mind is that Papa loves me. He has a place for me, in His heart. & He wants me there. He keeps me close to His heart, as the apple of His eye. He loves me, He loves me, He loves me. He is pleased with me, & proud of me. He lavishes His delight on me. He fills me up & uses me as a vessel to pour out. My heart, my soul, my mind, my love, my presence should leak that.
There are several people that have been specifically hand picked to walk this crazy life with me; along side me. Pushing me, encouraging me, loving me, & sharing this life with me--these experiences.
For me, I'm not very big on public displays of affection. That's just not me. But I just felt on my heart that I had to write & so here it is. My fiance knows for a fact that I never do this, if he read this, it would be a big shock to him. First of all, I myself hardly even show my emotions or explain how I feel much. Not that I bottle anything up, but it is difficult for me, years of practice being careful & not trusting is the excuse. Of course, I have gotten much better at opening up, but still it's not the easiest for me, & even now I am cautious of who I tell & share certain parts of my heart with.
Now, with all of this said. I am just so thankful. For life, for love, for peace, for joy, for grace. & there is one person on this earth that I know I am thankful for at such an in depth level that I had to take time to point it out; in a blog. His name is: Philip Stuart. He's the most amazing man. He is my other half. Tonight we talked before bed; which we always do, & I just listened. The entire phone call, I hardly spoke. Not because I was sad, upset, or sleepy, or anything. I just sat there on the couch & listened to everything that he had to say. The craziest thing to me was that while he spoke I just patiently sat & as I did quietly, I felt Jesus surround me in his arms. His arms around me, holding me, & my head rested on his chest. The lyrics: "I wanna sit at your feet, drink from the cup in your hands, lay back against you and breathe, it's overwhelming" played over & over as I listened to this wonderful man whom I love spoke about his heart & what his day consisted of. This week we had encounters & amazing speakers at school whom really spoke things that totes resonated in my heart & for my life. One amazingly anointed woman said this: "God is God the Father, Jesus is the form of your spouse, & the Holy Spirit is the female version of God." & with that, I remember the first thing that I felt inside of me was this: "You love like a Father, you love like a brother, you love like a lion, fierce like no other.  You violently chase me, down to embrace me, engulf me in who you are."
Relationship man, it is all about relationship. I don't have other words. This was just something a little random that was on my heart & had to express & share.

Just that wonderful, beautiful, thankful, loving moment.
May<3<3

I'm back.

All right, so what's up fellow bloggers? It has been quite some time since I have written on this blog. I have definitely missed it. I am really excited to start writing again. So here goes nothing.


School is amazing. God is doing great things. I have grown a tremendous amount. I have been blessed to meet and begin to build great relationships with such wonderful, anointed men and women of God. I have never been so pushed, stretched, excited, nervous (in a good way), joyful, happy, encouraged, inspired, thankful, and blessed in all of my life. Every second I am more thankful. It only makes sense though, to give as much thanks and praise as I can. Why? Well the easy answer is: Jesus. To elaborate though, is all because it is truly written in my DNA to give thanks and praise and pour out my love, heart, and adoration on the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. Crazy concept to grasp though, the fact that, the big guy upstairs..he cares for me. He loves me, and by the way, He loves me. I am His favorite, and He calls me His beloved. What else could I ask or live for? He is so faithful & I am incredibly grateful, with all of my being. No matter what though, I know that the enemy has nothing on me. He can sit there and try to put lies inside my head and whisper discouragements but I have the victory already so there is no reason to grow weary. 


Psalm 50:9-11 "I have no need of a bull from your stall or of goats from your pens, for every animal of the forest is mine, and the cattle on a thousand hills. I know every bird in the mountains, and the insects in the fields are mine." 


Isaiah 40:28-31
"Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not grow faint."


Jacquelyn Desiree<3<3

“Let it rain”

Right now things are in fact hard. However, I’m not gonna sit here & “vent” about how it is. I’m just pointing out fact. I won’t explain the entire story because it’s not entirely necessary. But the Lord is currently teaching me to let go. Of course that sounds easy but it’s not right now. In the current position I’m in, it’s a lot different than other situations I have delt with before. For me surrendering & letting go was always something I did not fear, nor should I, on account of Daddy loves me & has plans for me, and he’s taking care of everything. But right now, it’s intense. Serious crunch time, like I’m on the edge of my seat, like; “okay Dad, you can step in any time now.” I know that this whole thing is His glory but it’s like such a hard spot. I’m in this position of being STRETCHED. Like He’s really testing me here, in my faith & how much I trust in Him & His power. So many times when the Lord does not answer us the enemy thinks it’s totally okay & perfect timing for him to come in & bring anxiousness & fear. I refuse to let him think that he’s winning this. Because he’s not. My God is bigger, and stronger. My Dad is the provider, & I’m completely just trusting Him & His plan.

“God, I look to you. I won’t be overwhelmed, give me vision to see things like you do.”

“Cast all your anxiety on Him, for He cares for you.” 

Daddy, it’s all in your hands. I’m yours.

Jacquelyn Desiree<3<3 

No more.

For so long I let the opinions of others become so meaningful that it set and I let it shape my identity and who I thought I was and how I saw myself. When I should have been relying on my Father's eyes and how he sees me. Who he sees me as. His daughter, his treasure, his beloved. You were born with a purpose. You are beautiful, you are treasured and the only opinion that does and should matter is the Lord's. Because no one but he knows who you really are and all the potential you truly have. Your life is not your own, it belongs to no one else. Believe and walk in who the Lord created and appointed you to be. He is your beloved and you are his. Be encouraged, rely on him and trust in him. You are loved, remember that.

Change.

We prepare the way
Lord show us your glory. Let your presencee be known. Not only fill us and our hearts God but overflow in us with your joy, peace patience, love and grace. God that your name be lifted high for you conquered it all for us. Release yourself upon us. Make yourself known to a generation. Not only this generation rising up but that you release yourself in the older genereations and you would bridge the gap L:ord. Lord make it evident in our lives of who you are. That when people encounter us they encounter you and your presence. The power of your great love. For you deserve all the glory and praise, you alone are worth it all.
"The Lord is exalted over all the nations his glory alone the heavens." -Psalm 113:4
"From the rising of the sun to the place where it sets, the name of the Lord is to be praised." -Psalm 113:3


God we are petitioning heaven for a release to see your signs, wonders and miracles. We want to see you move in a generation. To make known who you are. To make known to this generation who they are in you, in Christ. Let us be known as a generation who seeks your face. So deeply in love and captivated by the Creator. The lover of my soul, the one who romances my heart. you say in your word: "I love those who love me and those who seek me find me." -Proverbs 8:35
Lord open the floodgates of heaven, let it rain. Let your kingdom come and your will be done.

I'm tired.

Of people using me. I am constantly trying to be there. I am constantly pouring out and loving and caring. And it’s constantly disregarded. I really don’t have time for it.

Well then.

See what happened was. Last night I came home from school and was kinda stressing since I had a major exam paper. You’d think that since I got it over with I’d be all happy go lucky and like calm. However, this was not the case. I was freaking out more than I was before I did the exam. So, I came home and one of my best friends, Sam called me. He came by to see if I was okay and stayed for maybe like half an hour. We just kinda talked…well he talked to my dad. About frickin guns. While I spastically cleaned the living room and kitchen. Sam actually helped me clean the living room.haha Then I wanted ice cream. So I ate my moms ice cream in the freezer and I put in the movie Armageddon and Sam left. After the movie was over I decided I’d go to bed, mind you it was about one am? So I went to my room but I wasn’t even tired. I turned off the lights and guess what happened?The same thing that ALWAYSSS happens to me when I wanna sleep but can’t. ha Jesus was like, get up. I was like “are you serious right now?” So I knew better than to fight him on this. Got up, blasted me some beautiful Jesus Culture, grabbed my bible, my journal, and shut up and listened. The Lord was really just revealing stufff to me. Things in me I didn’t even think about. It was quite lovely.ha So to sum it all up that’s what happened:)
I’m now in a good mood. Today’s a good day. I’m excited <3