What's up next?

The seasons are changing, the world is currently in a lull at the moment since the next big day is New Years. The Christmas songs are still lingering on the radio in every car, the decorations have yet to come down. We're all preparing for this New Year, and imagining what it will bring. If you're like me at all, you're praying into this new year and making plans, and dreaming up what this new year and this new season has in store. My heart is beating out of my chest with excitement for whatever is coming next. I have plans and right now I'm just processing my heart and my dreams. I'm working and sifting through what I feel God is pushing me towards in this new season. I'm not working right now, and I'm all signed up for school, waiting to hear back from a few different schools. I've got money saved up, I'm paying bills off, and I'm just all set up. I'm not sure what is going on, but I feel it in the atmosphere. God is doing something that I can't see just yet, and He just isn't quite ready to reveal to me. I'm ecstatic though, I'm preparing, I'm dreaming, I'm praying. 

I've really learned a lot this year, I've put myself through a lot, and I've seen myself grow and change--as we do every year. But this year that I'm currently looking back at, I'm not disappointed in, I'm seeing results from where I've been and where I'm going. I know that it took a lot of strength for me to get myself to where I am right now. I believe in myself and I know who I am. I know who I want to be, I know what I want to work on and how I want to grow. 

I used to get so frustrated with where I'm at. The process. It was like my dreaded season or location in which my life was living. It didn't even feel like living to me, I just felt like I was going through each day, getting things done. I'm finding now that, that wasn't living at all, that wasn't achieving anything. God has called us to have a full and abundant life, and that means a life with purpose, with meaning, with divine appointments. We were made for glory, we are filled with greatness. God created us specifically, oh so wonderfully and fearfully. That means something. That means that everything about us he created, every characteristic, they were all on purpose--after he created us he called us 'good'. I believe that. And I'm truly learning to take that into account and really let it sink into me. 

Lately I've been taking walks in the park, as often as possible really. The park near my apartment is literally two blocks away, I could probably walk to the park instead of drive. However, I choose to drive and then stay there for a while, walking. It's sort of like my secret garden with the Lord. It's my happy place, and my safe place. I go there mostly on Sunday's, just to process with the Lord and feel his presence. I go there to breathe, it's literally my breath of fresh air. I am doing everything in my power to live my life every day with meaning and purpose. I go to this park every week so that I can truly understand what it looks like to walk in the cool of the day with Him. I'm stewarding this lull of a season, and praying into what God really has next for me, I want to know. I encourage each of you reading to do the same. Challenge yourself in this new season, really be strategic, pour in, and watch as God fills you up some more. This new year has lots in store for us, but God will never give us more than we can handle-- otherwise it would kill us. He gives us exactly what we need to be full and to have the capacity to pour out. Be excited for what 2014 has in store, and dig in y'all, ask yourself what's next! 

Florida Weather,

Well here I am folks. Across the country from my beloved home town, my family, and my best friends. On a very real note. A lot has happened and changed over this past year--2013 held a lot of crazy experiences for me. As well as this year held a lot of great & unforgettable moments. I'm thankful & blessed nonetheless. So anyways. It's almost Christmas, here we are. It's funny to me that I can imagine all of my family and friends that are currently back home cuddled up for the night or whatever. And I'm in bed wearing shorts and a tank. Drinking hot tea however, just because I love it no matter what. The weather here is barely in it's low 80's. Back home it's almost & sort of is freezing. My best friend in fact got into a car accident this past weekend while driving in the snow for the first time. Thankfully, she was safe and not harmed in any way. Just freaked out. I miss home though. I miss Fall photo-shoots with Steph, I miss the rain & hot cocoa while being all wrapped up in blankets on the couch watching movies I've watched a million times over with my favorite people. I miss church and everyone there. I miss not being able to finish my bagel during second service & everyone making fun of me for it & then someone taking it & finishing it for me. I miss jumping on my little sisters and bugging the hell out of them every day. I miss my mom's cooking, I miss awkward moments with my step dad. I miss my amazing, anointed Grandma Winchester & our walks at Benicia State Park, I miss going to BCC with her & just sharing our hearts & whatever the lord was doing or showing us. I miss sushi dates with my aunt Katie. I miss all the little babies running around. I miss going to the movies with Zach & Boob--Caleb. I miss driving & walking right into the Parker's house without knocking or ringing the doorbell. I miss buying brownie mix & bringing it to the Parker's to randomly bake at eleven o' clock at night. I miss random adventures. I miss hiking with Steph. I miss going to the batting cages with my brother. I miss shopping & sister dates with my sissy-Lyna. I miss it all. That's what this Florida weather is doing to me. It doesn't feel like Christmas. Whenever I hear the Christmas music I just hear noise. When before I could feel the warmth & love that's completely wrapped up in it all. I know that this season is beautiful & wonderful. But I would be blatantly lying if I said I was perfectly happy here. Because Christmas & this whole season only means the world to me because of my family. And this is what the Florida weather is doing to me.